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The Food Scientist

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Posted 12 July 2019 - 06:51 PM

Hi everyone! Since it's Friday and it marks the end of the work week I thought I'd share this with you all for a good laugh :)


So as I was approving suppliers, I came across one of them that could be a potential supplier. I was looking at their questionnaire that they had filled up. One of the questions was: "Are your tests (Micro/chemical) conducted at an external or internal laboratory, if external please mention the name". So they said external and wrote down "LABCORP" . So for those of you who are not in the USA, Labcorp is a CLINICAL laboratory, you know where you draw your blood or get your urine tested?... I mean if you want to be dishonest, at least make it seem believable.... What did I do? Of course they were disapproved!  :silly:


What funny moments has everyone been through in their job? 

Everything in food is science. The only subjective part is when you eat it. - Alton Brown.



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Posted 12 July 2019 - 07:53 PM

At a poultry plant that was just being commissioned. The equpment was not functioning even close to what it should have, and we had purposely had a very very slow start, needless to say, in that sort of facility, the line at the back half has to keep running regardless of what the front end was doing..................so the birds kept on coming. We all ended up tossing birds where ever we could  ( i understand not funny to everyone, but if you've worked in slaughter, very very funny)

Please stop referring to me as Sir/sirs



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Posted 13 July 2019 - 03:53 AM

At the time I was an SQF and 3rd party auditor and one place stands out amoungst them all.

I was in Bakersfield, California doing a standard one day 3rd party audit on a large orange packhouse operation.

As I came around a corner on a packing line for 5 pound mesh bags of oranges with about 10 managers in tow I kept hearing this funny clicking noise and then realized it was coming from one of the packers that was working the line.

His job was to put a small plastic lock on each bag... by grabbing a plastic piece with his fingers off an automatic dispenser...

But I noticed he was not using the dispenser... and I could not figure out how he was putting the locks on the bags...

Until I climbed a flight of stairs over the packing line and watched him from an observation area.

What I observed was anazing... so much so that I started laughing to the point of doubling over!

The worker looked like a chipmunk.

His mouth was filled with those plastic locks to the point of his cheeks bulging on each side of his face and he had polished wooden disks inserted in his lips, upper and lower - frankly he looked like a duck with a rounded bill.

He had figured out a way to stuff his mouth with these plastic square locks ans flip each one out of his mouth and between the wooden disks (hense the clicking noise) and then pop them out between two fingers and onto each bag...

At absolutely asounding speed.

There I am as a serious auditor laughing mt head off and all the managers just stood there horrified.

Serious infaction, sure - but funny as all heck.

It got around at the auditing company and we nicknamed the employee DuckMan!

You had to be there to fully comprehend the picture!

All the Best,


All Rights Reserved,

Without Prejudice,

Glenn Oster.

Glenn Oster Consulting, LLC -

SQF System Development | Internal Auditor Training | eConsultant

Martha's Vineyard Island, MA - Restored Republic




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